


Hetalia: Stars & Stripes

by KnightofFive, missionquestthing



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Gen, United States
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-04
Updated: 2013-07-04
Packaged: 2017-12-17 16:46:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 10,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/869765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KnightofFive/pseuds/KnightofFive, https://archiveofourown.org/users/missionquestthing/pseuds/missionquestthing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collaboration project about the fifty state and the six territories of the United States of America. Set in the Hetalia Universe. Boston Tea Party. Building towards the Civil War. Cross Posted from FanFiction.net</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Encounter Zero: Economy

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter is just to get things into swing. Try not to judge the whole story off this chapter. The other chapters are better

"Hey guys the economy totally sucks!" Shouts America while facing a room of over fifty people, "As my sidekicks it is your duty to help the hero fix this!"

"Merchandising and tourism is the best was to boost the economy," States New York matter of factly while pulling out a "I <3 NY" shirt and a Statue of Liberty lighter.

"If you want tourism, how about gambling too!" Nevada chimes in.

"Or amusement parks!" Florida adds.

"Forget them tourists and such, more jobs in the oil industry is the way to go." Texas says assuredly. Alaska glances over at him.

"How about more Walmarts ya'll?" Asks Arkansas.

"Ya dense there boy? How hard in da head do ya haveta be to think that'd work?" Argued Ozark Missouri causing his twin Northern Missouri to sigh.

From there, arguments broke out everywhere.

Utah and Nevada bickering about gambling.

The Dakotas started breaking things that came between them.

Massachusetts threw a punch at New York, prompting Illinois to pull out his gun.

Hawaii just sits there smiling while Washington State plays absentmindedly on her laptop.

America just watched the whole thing excitedly while Washington D.C. sighs and rubs his head like he has a headache.


	2. Character Profiles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A list of characters. Others will we added as stories pertaining to them are written. Input is always welcome but like Hetalia they are built on stereotypes more than anything factual about the states.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If characters are listed here but have not shown up in a story yet it is because a story is planned for them. Have patience with us. :) We are always accepting suggestions on characters and American events. I'm sorry but we will not cover anything really unpleasant like terrorist attacks or such.

* * *

 

Name: Alaska

Nickname: The last Frontier

Ethnicity: Alaskan Native/German

Birthday: January 3rd, 1959 (49th State)

Gender: Male

Human Age: 17

Height: 5' 11"

Body Type: Athletic

Skin Tone: Tan

Hair: Black

Eye: Blue

State Motto: "North to the Future"

State Capital: Juneau

Bio:

Alaska is a state known for being a bit dense and weird. He is actually a fun loving state with an enjoyment for outdoor activities like fishing, kayaking, and hunting. He is quite lonely due to being separated from the rest of the states. Strongly believes that Kumojiro is actually Canada. He owns a team of sled dogs that most states think are how he gets around.

Appearance:

Alaska has a strong athletic build, although not incredibly muscular. His skin and hair reflect his Inuit heritage and his build and eyes reflect his German heritage. He normally wears the trademark Inuit coat of his heritage. He always wears an olive green hunting cap and a pair of jeans and hiking boots. He carries a rifle with him in case of bear attacks, or if he gets lost in the wilderness.

* * *

Name: Arkansas

Nickname: The Natural State

Ethnicity: Caucasian

Birthday: June 15th 1836 (25th State)

Gender: Male

Human: 24

Height: 5' 11"

Body Type: Average

Skin Tone: Pale

Hair: Brown

Eye: Hazel

State Motto: The People Rule

State Capital: Little Rock

Bio:

Has a rivalry with Ozark (South Missouri). Considered dim by the other states, he enjoys fishing and hunting. He is a more conservative state with strong religious beliefs. Proud of the fact that it is the only state where real diamonds are mined, and that it is the home of Wal-mart. As a driver is well known to cross over the lines. Although shares a lot of traits in common with Ozark he views himself as vastly superior.

Appearance:

He normally wears jeans, cowboy boots, wife beater, and a browning jacket. He has messy short brown hair.

* * *

Name: Florida

Nickname: The Sunshine State

Ethnicity: Hispanic

Birthday: March 3rd, 1845 (27th State)

Gender: Male

Human: 24

Height: 5' 10"

Body Type: Athletic

Skin Tone: Tan

Hair: Blonde

Eye: Brown

State Motto: "In God We Trust"

State Capital: Tallahassee

Bio:

Florida is a state known for his love of sports, swimming, and other outside activities. He likes to go out onto the beach for "Sight Seeing" purposes. He likes to look at all the pretty people out there and get to know them a little better. Has a soft spot for the elderly. He drives at a very slow speed. Florida has a very large perverted streak.

Appearance

Florida has short messy blonde hair and brown eyes that are usually behind sunglasses. He normally wears shorts and a tank top. He has a swimmers build. Has a tendency to take of his clothes.

* * *

Name: Hawaii

Nickname: The Aloha State

Ethnicity: Hawaiian/Japanese

Birthday: Augest 21st, 1959

Gender: Female

Human Age: 16

Height: 5' 3"

Body Type: Athletic

Skin Tone: Tan

Hair: Long Black

Eye: Brown

State Motto: "The Life of the Land is perpetuated in righteousness"

State Capital: Honolulu

Bio:

Hawaii is a very friendly state known for tourism, typically known for her rich culture and dancing. Very laid back and likes to set out on the beach and have fun. She owns a pet Shark, and enjoys eating fresh fruit and conversing with people. She holds a grudge against America for forcing her to be a state.

Appearance:

Hawaii is tanned with an Asian skin tone and eyes. Has long black hair with a red flower in her hair. Wears a hibiscus flower over her right ear. She normally wears colorful tank dresses unless on special occasions where she wears more traditional clothes.

* * *

Name: Massachusetts

Nickname: The Codfish State

Ethnicity: Caucasian

Birthday: February 6th 1788 (6th state)

Gender: Male

Human Age: 30

Height: 5' 10"

Body Type: Lanky

Skin Tone: Pale

Hair: Sandy Brown

Eye: Green

State Motto: "By the sword we seek peace, but peace only under liberty."

State Capital: Boston

Bio: A man who is highly educated and tries to put on the airs of a gentleman but is generally a rascal that brings about change. Obsessed with sports, a terrible driver, and a lover of scotch, cranberry juice, and tea. Has a heavy accent and is prone to saying things like "wicked awesome" or "wicked amazing". Deathly afraid of witches and believes he is better than Britain while at the same time using British city names for the names of his own cities.

Appearance: A slender man with narrow shoulders and hips. Dresses in a suit on most occasions. Sandy-almost blonde hair and green eyes. Tries to keep his hair slicked back but there are always several wisps of hair that escape no matter what he tries. Carries a pair of reading glasses.

* * *

Name: Missouri (Northern)

Nickname: The Show Me State

Ethnicity: Caucasian

Birthday: August 10th, 1821 (24th)

Gender: Female

Human: 26

Height: 5' 5"

Body Type: Average/Slender

Skin Tone: Pale

Hair: Blonde

Eye: Blue

State Motto: "welfare of the people shall be the supreme law."

State Capital: Jefferson City

Bio:

Like her brother Ozark, she enjoys barbeque and beer. She considered conservative to other states, but her brother finds her very liberal. She is a very hard worker and is very polite, has a violent streak that keeps her brother in line. She calls her brother Missouree. She is stubborn and not easily convinced of things. She enjoys farming agriculture, while her brother mostly does animals. She works with her brother for tourism. She is considered dim by most other states. She believes that her and her brother have lots of friends due to having eight neighbors, their neighbors do not see it that way.

Appearance:

Shoulder length wavy blonde hair, she also has freckles. She has a small bust size. She wears a scarf around her neck. She wears a mid-calf length skirt, a tank top, and denim jacket with sandals.

* * *

Name: Ozark (Southern Missouri)

Nickname: The Show Me State

Ethnicity: Caucasian

Birthday: August 10th 1821 (24th State)

Gender: Male

Human: 26

Height: 5' 11"

Body Type: Average

Skin Tone: pale/Sun burn

Hair: Blonde

Eye: Blue

State Motto: "The welfare of the people shall be the supreme law."

State Capital: Jefferson City

Bio:

Ozark enjoys a lot of outdoor activities. He enjoys drinking beer and having Barbeques, much more religious and conservative than his twin sister. Thinks of himself more of a southern state, he has a bitter rivalry with his neighbor Arkansas. He calls his sister Missoura. He really enjoys country music. Normally he is in a cheerful mood. He is stubborn and is not easily convinced. He does a lot of animal farming while his sister does agriculture. Works with his sister for tourism. He is considered quite dim and he believes that he and his sister have lots of friends in their border states, they do not seem to agree with his thoughts.

Appearance:

Close cropped blonde hair, he typically wears jeans and cowboy boots, with a baseball cap. He wears a t-shirt. Wears a crucifix around his neck, he has some facial hair scruff on his face. He is typically sun burnt.

* * *

Name: Nevada

Nickname: Silver State

Ethnicity: Hispanic/White

Birthday: October 31st, 1864 (36th State)

Gender: Female

Human: 23

Height: 5' 0"

Body Type: Athletic

Skin Tone: Tan

Hair: Dark Brown

Eye: Brown

State Motto: "All for our country"

State Capital: Carson City

Bio: An very energetic young woman who is very open minded and loves to flirt. Dances often, loves to gamble, ski and hunt. She is the older sister to Utah and they shared a territory until 1861.

Appearance: long brown hair typically pulled back into a half ponytail with white feathers coming up in the back. Typically wears a vegas showgirl tux outfit but is known to wear a variety of outfits. The feathers always stay, they represent the vegas strip. Very Hispanic in appearance but some Caucasian features filter their way into her face.

* * *

Name: Washington

Nickname: The Evergreen State

Ethnicity: Caucasian

Birthday: November 11th, 1889 (42nd State)

Gender: Male

Human Age: 18

Height: 5' 2"

Body Type: Average

Skin Tone: Pale

Hair: Blonde

Eye: Blue

State Motto: "By and by"

State Capital: Olympia

Bio: A fairly young state that is often either forgotten or mistaken for the country's capital. Has an intense love for coffee, her laptop, music, and the rain. Very eco-friendly but very prone to depression. A pioneer in online shopping and generally considered lazy but really good at raising crops.

Appearance: Jaw length blonde hair held back by a plaid hair band. Wears a plaid skirt with suspenders (hang down) over black leggings with lace-up black rain boots that come up about mid calf. Wears a black hoodie over a grunge rock t-shirt. Can typically be found with headphones in and coffee in hand. Wears a midcalf pea coat and carries an umbrella.

* * *

Name: Puerto Rico

Nickname: Land of the valiant lord

Ethnicity: Caucasian

Birthday: December 10th 1898 (Not state)

Gender: Male

Human: 8

Height: 3' 0"

Body Type: Chibi

Skin Tone: Dark

Hair: dark Brown

Eye: Brown

State Motto: John is his name

State Capital: San Juan

Bio: Does not like being a territory, but cannot decide whether to become a country or a state. He is an adamant boxer, has lots of tourism. Likes to have fun and party, but avoids work when he can. People tend to think that he is a small time crook. Keeps getting asked how many kids he has. Keeps getting confused for Mexico or Costa Rico, he has the habit of speaking Spanish before speaking English. People seem to think that he smells.

Appearance: Junk in the trunk… for a chibi, has a tan skin tone with short dark brown messy hair. Normally wears a tank top, shorts, and flip flops.

* * *

Name: California

Nickname: The Golden State

Ethnicity: Hispanic

Birthday: September 9th, 1850 (31st)

Gender: Male

Human: 21

Height: 5' 8"

Body Type: Athletic

Skin Tone: Tanned

Hair: Blonde

Eye: Brown

State Motto: Eureka

State Capital: Sacramento

Bio:

Sufer dude attitude, known for doing things over top. Has a vain attitude about himself. Considers himself to be one of the greatest states alive. He likes to drink wine. He loves to be in the spot light and dislikes it when others outshine him. He is almost always in a good mood and can seem to have his head in the clouds. Enjoys making one liners.

Appearance:

Has long blonde hair and brown eyes with tanned skin. He normally wears a pair of swim shorts and a tank top with an over shirt. Wears sunglasses and a backwards baseball cap.

* * *

Name: Virginia

Nickname: Old Dominion

Ethnicity: White

Birthday: June 25th 1788 (10th)

Gender: Male

Human: 30

Height: 5" 11"

Body Type: Athletic

Skin Tone: White

Hair: Blonde

Eye: Blue

State Motto: thus always to tyrants

State Capital: Richmond

Bio:

A militaristic man, he is a strong fighter who can take some time to make up his mind about something, but when he does he set his mind to something he works as hard as he can to accomplish his goals; is well known for his "Southern hospitality" with large meals and very welcoming. He has a violent streak. He has a hobby of drinking. He speaks with a tidewater accent. He is considered the ringleader of the southern states.

Appearance:

A handsome man with pushed back messy blonde hair and piercing blue eyes, he has scars from the time of the civil war. Normally wears casual clothes that look nice. Gives of the impression of being rich.

* * *

Name: New York

Nickname: The Empire State

Ethnicity: Caucasian

Birthday: July 26th 1788 (11th)

Gender: Male

Human: 29

Height: 5' 10"

Body Type: Average

Skin Tone: White

Hair: Brown

Eye: Brown

State Motto: Ever Upward

State Capital: Albany

Bio:

A man with a flair for theater and dense traffic, he has a Brooklyn accent. Has a strong tendency to curse, claims to have seen it all and does not respond a lot to strange things. Loves New York City and is always carrying around statue of liberty lighters and other memorabilia. Whenever a state or other person visits him he always manages to get them into an I heart New York shirt without them noticing.

Appearance:

He can normally be seen in a messy business suit with short brown hair and harsh brown eyes. He is usually laid back and slouching. He has strong Italian roots that show up in his skin tone, hair, and eyes.

* * *

Name: Illinois

Nickname: The Prairie State

Ethnicity: Caucasian

Birthday: December 3rd, 1818 (21st)

Gender: Male

Human: 24

Height: 5' 8"

Body Type: Athletic

Skin Tone: Pale

Hair: Brown

Eye: Brown

State Motto: State Sovereignty, National Union

State Capital: Springfield

Bio:

A young man that enjoys theater; Illinois has a darker side and seems to work with the mafia. Always carries a hand gun with him. Always brings spaghetti to any barbeque or get together. Always says things are about fifteen minutes away. He has a sports rivalry with Missouri and Wisconsin , he loves ports. He is a talented cook, who likes large helpings. He can be condescending, and quite arrogant yet generally upbeat.

Appearance:

He wears well fitted slacks, a dress vest both black, a dark purple long sleeved button up shirt, cream scarf and black fedora. He has shoulder length brown hair and depending on his mood either bright friendly chestnut brown eyes, or fierce dark brown almost black eyes.

* * *

Name: Wisconsin

Nickname: The Badger State

Ethnicity: Caucasian (German)

Birthday: May 29th, 1848 (30th)

Gender: Female

Human: 23

Height: 5' 9"

Body Type: Curvy

Skin Tone: White

Hair: Blonde

Eye: Blue

State Motto: Forward

State Capital: Madison

Bio:

A happy laid back girl who enjoys to farm and to party. She is famous for dairy farming, but even more infamous for her drinking. She likes to relax and have a good time. Rather intelligent and a good driver even when drunk. She works hard all day then has fun all night. She is an avid hunter. She is a massive Green Bay Packers fan. She and Illinois are good friends but fierce rivals.

Appearance:

A blonde hair girl with shoulder length wavy hair tied into two short pig tails. Wears a plaid shirt tied below her breasts into a mid-drift shirt, a pair of jeans and work boots. She has a large breast size. During the winter she wears a coat. She has a few freckles on her face from her small amount of Irish decent. Her blue eyes and blonde hair are from her German decent.

* * *

Name: Minnesota

Nickname: Land of 10,000 lakes

Ethnicity: Caucasian/Nordic

Birthday: May 11, 1858 (32nd)

Gender: male

Human: 23

Height: 6' 0"

Body Type: Muscular

Skin Tone: pale

Hair: blonde

Eye: blue

State Motto: The Star of the North

State Capital: Saint Paul

Bio:

Generally nice and easy to get along with but has a bit of a superiority complex. An outdoorsman who especially loves fishing. His favorite sport is hockey and is really good at it. Very physically fit and healthy. Exercises often and generally eats well, aside from beer drinking. Hangs out with Wisconsin and Illinois all the time, despite all the crap they give each other. Very resistant to the cold.

Appearance:  
Very muscular and fairly tall. Wears glasses when reading which he carries on him at all times. Short shaggy almost white-blonde hair. Wears jeans, running shoes, t-shirts with sayings on them like "my governor can beat up your governor", and over shirts (long sleeve in winter and short sleeve in summer).

* * *

Name: Utah

Nickname: Beehive State

Ethnicity: Caucasian

Birthday: January 4th, 1896 (45th State)

Gender: Male

Human: 18

Height: 5' 8"

Body Type: Average

Skin Tone: Average

Hair: Sandy Blonde

Eye: Green

State Motto: Industry

State Capital: Salt Lake City

Bio

A Mormon, he is the younger brother of Nevada. He is normally a nice guy who is always offering sweets to those he meets. He is a talker who can go on for quite a while. The only person that seems to get under his skin is his sister, who's antics and lecherous ways always seems to get to him. Utah comes across as a prude. He is actually a proud brother, but does not act like it most of the time.

Appearance:

Utah has short sandy blonde hair. He usually keeps a calm demeanor but can put a smile on pretty quickly when around others. He usually wears a nice shirt and pants. He wears a pair of wire frame glasses.

* * *

Name: District of Columbia

Nickname: The Federal City

Ethnicity: African American

Birthday: July 16th, 1790

Gender: male

Human: 21

Height: 6'0"

Body Type: Slender/Athletic

Skin Tone: dark

Hair: Black

Eye: Brown

Motto: Justice for All

Capital: Washington D.C.

Bio:

An intellectual, goal oriented young man. He has a very straightforward personality but is not generally rude about it. He can come off as a bit snooty at times. It falls to him to help try to keep America in line, which is a great hassle for him but he takes most things in stride. Most of the time the most reaction you will get out of him is a disappointed or frustrated sigh. He is very business minded most of the time but he does actually have a well-hidden fun side. He wants to become a state but America keeps turning him down. He is used to high crime rates in his territory so he stays fairly unfazed by any shows of violence going on around him, he usually just carries on with whatever he is doing. He is however, quite capable at protecting himself in combat. He has secret service training and will switch to that mode when he feels the situation calls for it, which is not often.

Appearance: A tall, fit man who wears glasses. He usually wears a pressed business suit but will dress down into slacks and a button up shirt. His nails are well taken care of and his skin appears healthy. His attention to his appearance leads America to call him a metro sexual, in which he replies that America is a slob. He wears his hair really short, almost shaved but not quite.

* * *

 


	3. Encounter One: Crusise Ships

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Washington and Alaska

 

* * *

Washington was alerted to the arrival of Alaska by the frightened murmuring of the other patrons inside the little café. Looking up from her coffee she sees him headed over to her table still wearing his rifle on his back and his usual parka. Didn't that moron know to leave those at home? This is her state not his, random bears aren't going to attack him and his coat is now entirely soaked through from the rain.

"Have you ever heard of an umbrella?" She asks him as he drapes his rifle strap across the back of his chair and still wearing his dripping coat, sits down across from her.

"But umbrellas are useless in the snow…" Responded the man with a confused expression on his face.

"Excuse me sir," Inquired the waitress nervously, "can I get you something to drink? Or maybe something to eat?"

"Hot chocolate please."

"Put a shot of espresso in it for him," interjected Washington.

"Umm okaaaayyy?" Responded Alaska. He likes coffee but was confused on why it had to be in hot chocolate.

"Everyone in Washington drinks coffee and you are in a coffee shop. When in Rome do as the Romans do," explains Washington as the waitress leaves to make Alaska's drink.

They sat there quietly for a few moments before Alaska awkwardly asks, "So about those cruise ships?"

"I was thinking it would be mutually beneficial to run some ships back and forth between our homes. It should boost both of our economies."

The waitress returned and placed a cup in front of strange young man, "that will be $3.15, sir."

Alaska happily paid for his drink and then turned to the girl in front of him, "Wow! This would have cost way more at home! The cost of living is getting really ridiculous up there! I have been really wanting a new fishing pole for a long time but I can never seem to be able to afford one after I pay for everything else I need."

"Why don't you buy it online? I buy everything I can online," Said Washington as she pulled her laptop from her bag. After a few clicks and some brief typing she turned the computer around to face him, "This is Amazon, you can buy almost anything here. Just search for the phrase fishing pole, unless you now the exact brand you want."

Alaska began timidly browsing the website until he found THE pole, the one that he had been drooling over at his local sporting goods store, and this one was half the price! He excitedly whirled the computer back around to Washington, almost knocking over her coffee in the process, "This is amazing! How do I order it?"

"Well first you have to make an account…" She trailed off as her eyes lit across a certain phrase. Looking up at his hopeful, excited face she stated, "Sorry, continental US only."

She watched him as the realization sank in, she could almost see his dreams crumbling away. Standing she moved her chair closer to his so she could comfort the defeated man.

Glancing over at the strange duo, the waitress decided she would wait awhile to see if they needed anything else, "Geeze I can see seasonal depression from here."

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are Cruise lines that run between Alaska and Seattle, Washington. It is common in the US to find things that say continental US only in fine print. Amazon is based in Washington. The cost of living is incredibly high in Alaska. Washington always carries her computer because Microsoft is based in Washington. As for the coffee, Starbucks and Seattle's Best are based in Washington. Remember this everything about characters is based on stereotypes, hence everyone in Washington drinks coffee, and it always rains there. Same with Alaska. If there are any historical events you would like us to do please let us know. Please Review!


	4. Encounter Three: Tea Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Massachusetts and APH Britain / ChibiMassachusetts and APH Britain

* * *

 

Britain smiled as his cab pulled up to Massachusetts' home; he had a fondness for his unruly former colony, probably because he was the one state that reminded him of himself. He removed his suitcase and paid the driver before turning his attention back to the manor. "Hmmm he put in a swimming pool since I was last here, but why not hide it in the back yard like a proper gentleman?" Thought the Brit as he wheeled his handy little suitcase up the walkway.

Massachusetts was distracted from his reading by a knock at the door. Remembering that Britain was to be arriving soon, he reluctantly marked his place in the book and headed to the door to greet his houseguest.

"Good Evening, come in, come in!"

"Good Evening, here I brought something for you, let me get it," returned Britain as he reached into the front pouch of his suitcase. He pulled out a small box of tea and handed it over to the younger man. "A box of my best tea…" He was cut off because as soon as the box hit Massachusetts' hand it became airborne, eventually landing in the swimming pool.

"Sorry, force of habit I guess," Said a very dejected looking Massachusetts.

"Force of habit! What kind of excuse is that for ruining my BEST tea! It was a gift you wanker! Is this how you treat your guests now?!"

Massachusetts just ignored the yelling man as he walked over to the edge of the pool and pondered fishing the tea out, "Do you think it is still usable?"

* * *

December 16, 1773

A young child strolled merrily down to the harbor. Britain smiled happily as his young colony approached him, "I brought you some tea, and it is cheaper this time!"

Massachusetts approached the table that the older man was sitting behind and glanced down at the invoice, "Wow it is cheaper but what is this line? I don't remember agreeing to a tea tax!"

Britain groaned, "Yes there is a tax but even with the tax it is cheaper than every other tea available here. Besides the tax money goes right back into supporting you and your brothers."

"You have no right to tax me!" Shouted the child as he launched the table, causing Britain to have to dodge both the table and the stacks of paperwork, "Next time ask first!"

Massachusetts then just turned around and walked casually away like nothing had happened.

"That one is going to be a problem," Britain sighed as he began to gather up as many papers as he could.

Later that night after brilliantly disguising himself as a local native, young Massachusetts returned to the harbor. He was glad that he had decided to wear the face paint when he discovered that Britain was still there and guarding the tea. He charged in and immediately started kicking crates of tea into the harbor. Britain just watched in sheer bewilderment as the child hurled crates larger than himself into the water. He hadn't realized that all the colonies shared the same strength as America and he couldn't understand the wanton destruction of tea.

* * *

Modern Era

"Do you think it is still usable?"

"No! I think the chlorine has thoroughly ruined it. What do you have against me! This is the second time you have destroyed tea that I gave you! I know you love tea so why?!"

"I'm not sure, this seems to happen every time I touch British tea," pondered Massachusetts, "you should see how many stores I have been thrown out of. The part I can't figure out is that the tea always seems to find water: toilets, puddles, fish tanks, and now it seems swimming pools."

After the men fished the box out of the swimming pool, Massachusetts showed Britain to the room he would be using while staying there.

"So did you bring anymore tea with you," He asked hopefully.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Boston tea party occurred December 16, 1773. Britain allowed the East India Company to bring their tea directly to the colonies instead of using middle men to help cut the price of tea in the colonies and to eliminate a build-up of tea in storehouses. Even with the tea tax, the tea was cheaper than the smuggled tea and the other legitimate tea coming into the colonies at the time. Britain tried to keep the tax under wraps but believed that they had plenty of right to tax the colonies especially since the money was used to pay officials in the colonies. The Colonies caught word of the tax anyway and the result was the tea ships being sent back to Britain without the colonies accepting it except in Massachusetts. The governor there would not allow the ship to be sent back or the other two ships that arrived later. Twenty days after the arrival of the first ship arrived a group of Boston citizens dressed as Native Americans and threw all the tea into the harbor. It took nearly three hours because chests held more than 90,000 lbs of tea, which would cost nearly $1,000,000 dollars today. Anyway the colonies were worried about taxation without representation, that was the issue. It was more a matter of principle than anything else.
> 
> A/N: Wow I didn't mean to write out a full history lesson up there. Doesn't Britain strike you as someone who would use a rolling suitcase? Oh and all states are Chibi until they become official states, so imagine the American Revolution with America and 13 little children in war attire. If there are any historical events you would like us to do please let us know. Please Review!


	5. Encounter Three: Puerto Rico

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chibi Puerto Rico, Florida, and APH America

* * *

¡Hola mi hermano! (Hello my brother!) Shouted the young territory at the Hispanic man coming towards him.

¡Hola Puerto Rico! ¿Por qué esta hablando español? (Hello Puerto Rico! Why are we speaking Spanish?) Questioned Florida.

"Oh sorry about that!" the young man replied, "Spanish is my primary language so I tend to forget which one I'm supposed to be using."

Instead of answering the older man went up to Puerto Rico, dropped his suitcase and started sniffing the child. "You don't smell nearly as bad as I thought you would! What is your secret?"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?!" Shouted Puerto Rico as he punched the older man in the face, "Seriously? What is your problem? Did Spain drop you on your head as a baby?"

Florida pouted while rubbing his cheek, he had forgotten that Puerto Rico is well known for his skills in boxing, "But everyone says you don't bathe. I was thinking you would really smell but you don't! You just don't want to share your secret! I want to smell like flowers without having to shower!"

"Okay. First of all, I don't smell like flowers. Secondly, I shower daily. It is too hot here not to. And lastly, you are gross as well as rude. Why are you visiting? Hopefully not just to sniff me!"

"I heard Puerto Ricans were sexy, so I decided to come here for my vacation and see for myself…is that America over there?" Asked Florida pointing at a blonde man who seemed to arguing with the airport restaurant about something.

"Sí, That appears to be him. Come on let's go save that poor employee from him and find out why he is here. But if he dares sniff me, you are both going home right this moment," groaned the young man.

"All I want is a hamburger! .GER."

The girl behind the counter just sighed, "I'm sorry sir, but I told you already we don't carry hamburgers here."

"Yo! America! What are you doing here?"Shouted Florida.

The blonde man turned around, "Oh good Puerto Rico! And Florida too! Help me here, she doesn't seem to understand English!"

"But she was totally just speaking English to you dude! I don't think this place sells burgers. Why don't we go somewhere else and get some?" Replied the confused state.

"I'm sorry about him miss," apologized Puerto Rico as he began to drag America away, "would you mind telling me why you are here harassing my citizens?"

"They're my citizens too," pouted America before he remembered why his boss sent him here in the first place, "Do you want to become one with me officially?"

"Dude, he is like eight years old!" Shouted the appalled man. Puerto Rico just glared at them both.

"That is why my boss sent me! If Puerto Rico became a state then he could become a full member of the American family and he would grow up! Personally I think it is an amazing plan! What do you say Puerto Rico?"

"I don't really know if I want to be a state or not. I hate my current status as a commonwealth but I'm not sure that becoming a state is the best solution."

"Of course it is!" exclaimed America as he pulled out a huge accordion photo wallet, "Here I will show you how happy your brothers and sisters are!" With a quick flick of his wrist the wallet flipped open and the photo accordion dropped to the floor on one end, "I have pictures of all my children! Look here is Florida when he became the 27th state, doesn't he look happy!"

"Are you and papa Spain both tugging on his arms?" asked the young territory.

"I don't remember being naked, why am I naked?" asked Florida bewildered.

"It took a lot of convincing to get Spain to give him to me," Replied America happily, "And Florida, you are always naked."

"Poor Spain, what about the other states?" Asked Puerto Rico, hoping to get this over with as soon as possible.

Excited that the young man seemed interested in his photos America Preceded to show off all of his 'children' to him.

"And this is Alaska, he worked so hard and begged me so much to become the 49th state. Doesn't he look happy?"

Puerto Rico just laughed looking at the picture, a little child Alaska with gun in hand and one foot placed triumphantly on America.

"And finally last but not least the beautiful Hawaii! She played so hard to get."

Puerto Rico stopped laughing, "Hard to get? You have her in a headlock and she is crying! She doesn't look happy at all!"

"She was just being difficult, but don't worry she loves being a state now!"

Florida who had been only somewhat paying attention decided to add in his two cents, "But the real question is WHERE are we going to put the STAR? We can't have 51 states! The other countries are going to laugh at us!"

"Star?" Asked America as he magically pulled a large star and an American flag and slapped the star in the center of the flag, "How about here?"

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A character profile for Puerto Rico has been added to the profile page. So it has been so long since I wrote anything in Spainsh so correct me is it wasn't correct. I have this idea that America sees all fifty states as his children, even if they don't necessarily see him that way. Sorry about the little bit of commentary on American customers. All states are Chibi before they officially become a state then they start to age, hence why Puerto Rico is a child. As to why Florida is naked, a lot of news in Florida seems to include nudity for some reason. Spain very grudgingly ceded Florida to America. Alaska had to fight for their statehood but Hawaii was basically forced into statehood. Puerto Rico is pretty divided on whether or not they want to become a state but a majority of the US seems to be more worried about where the freaking star will go i we had 51 states. There have been some nicely designed 51 star flags. this story was a request by 1andOnlyJanae. If there are any historical events you would like us to do please let us know. Please Review!


	6. Encounter Four: Surf's Up!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hawaii, California, Florida

* * *

Hawaii waited in her living room for California to arrive. It had been awhile since she had another state visit her, and even less often that one wanted to go surfing with her. She heard a car door slam and rushed over to the front door. Before greeting her guest she checked to make sure she looked okay in the mirror next to the door. Deciding that she looked passable, she opened the door and saw California with his luggage slung over his shoulder heading towards her house.

"Dude! I totally got laid!" California called to her while chuckling to himself and gesturing to the lei around his neck.

Hawaii gave the other state a blank and confused stare, "What are you… never mind," She cracked a smile and gestured inside her home, "Welcome California! Why don't you drop off your stuff inside and we can get ready to catch some waves!"

"Sounds sweet, do we need some kind of spray or something though?" He asked, a little concerned, when he got closer to her,

Hawaii's face again dropped back to a confused blank stare. "Well I would suggest sunscreen."

The other state laughed out loud and patted her back roughly. "Nah man! Not for the sun! I meant like a repellent! Yah know, for the sharks."

"No. There are very few shark attacks, we will be fine." She deadpanned.

"Oh… cool!" He replied following her into her home. As he walked into the living room he turned to come face to face with a massive shark snout. Shrieking in terror he cringed back and covered his face.

"What are you doing?" Hawaii asked the state cowering on her floor in front of Sharky's tank.

He uncovered his eyes to realize that there was glass between him and the vicious man eating monster. "YOU HAVE A SHARK IN YOUR HOUSE!" He squealed.

Hawaii sighed and climbed up a ladder to pet Sharky, "Do not worry, Sharky is a pet, and is as friendly as can be, He would not hurt anybody, unless they are made of food."

The blonde man did not seem entirely convinced and was rather freaked out by her being so friendly with a SHARK, "Oh… cool. So I better go and get ready then." He quickly snatched up his luggage and left her to her monster petting. He was defiantly going to have to reconsider staying the night here.

"What a weird person." She said soothingly to Sharky as California practically ran from the room.

* * *

~At the Beach~

California and Hawaii both paddled out into the water, the waves looking wild and massive.

"Alright, looks like we got some wicked waves going on. Now Hawaii, Let me show you how a real man surfs. I mean when people think of America and surfing they think of my state, maybe you will pick up a few things." California bragged before heading further out and catching a decently sized wave. As he felt his awesomeness accumulating he suddenly noticed that Hawaii was not watching him, but rather was already catching an even bigger wave. He watched in almost horror as he was completely outdone, she was even performing tricks!

The two surfed for a couple more hours with him occasionally becoming so distracted by her moves that he himself totally got wiped out. Finally, they returned to the beach. "Nice surfing out there." Hawaii smiled while holding out her hand. .

California smirked but shook her hand begrudgingly, "Yah you have got some pretty sick moves."

* * *

~Later that Night~

Florida set on his patio that overlooked the beach about to enjoy the new dirty magazine that he had purchased when he heard the phone ring. Wondering who would be calling at this time he answered it, "Hello, Florida here."

"Yo Florida! California here! Dude I was totally awesome today at surfing! I caught some amazing wave-age but Hawaii completly trashed me"

"Well yeah … wait you went to Hawaii to surf today?" Answered Florida a little caught off guard.

"Yeah man, why?"

"And you didn't invite me?"

"What about it? It's not like you're big into surfing or anything." Replied the Golden State, complelty oblivious to why his friend would want to go to surfing.

"Un-cool dude; un-cool."

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The United States is on the list of the Top 50 Surfing Locations 9 times: Hawaii- 4 times, California- 2 times, Florida- 1 time, Puerto Rico- 1 time, and North Carolina 1 time. Hawaii is ranked 1st, 10th, 19th, & 25th. California is ranked 5th & 41st. Florida is ranked 14th. Puerto Rico is 27th and NC is 39th. Modern surfing originated from Hawaii however most Americans think "surfer dude" and think of California. Florida has a dirty magazine because Florida is becoming the new porn capital of the US. There is a common belief that Hawaii has rampant shark problem but there is no statistical difference between shark attacks there and anywhere else surrounded by water. Petting a shark is a really bad idea, they have really rough skin. California and Florida have an epic bromance. California has been added to the Character Profiles. If there are any historical events you would like us to do please let us know. Please Review!


	7. Encounter Five: Memorial Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virginia, New York, Massachusetts, Assorted other states, & APH America

* * *

Virginia was sitting on his couch enjoying a nice cold glass of his famous sweet tea when he heard his cell phone ring. Recognizing it as New York's ringtone, he sighed and turned off his television before answering it. "Hello New York, to what do I owe this phone call?"

"Hey Virginia! What are you doing? I have got a question for ya! Memorial Day is next week and so I was thinking that I would host a barbeque for all the states.

I know ya are really into it and such and I need someone to help me get it off the ground. What do you think?"

"I am always up for a cook out why don't we have it at my house?" Replied Virginia before taking a sip of his tea.

"Sure, why not. Saves me on the clean-up! I will invite everyone. Bye!"

"Always the rude one," sighed the Old Dominion, clicking his TV back on.

* * *

~~~On Memorial Day~~~

"Hey Virginia, looks like everything is set up! Everyone should be arriving soon and bringing stuff. Here is my contribution." Sates New York as he drops a large box of 'I 3 NY' T-shirts on the table next to Virigina's several containers of tea.

"More of your stupid shirts? I'm pretty sure no one wants one, in fact I'm pretty sure we all own at least one, thanks to you. Couldn't you have brought something edible?"

"Oh yea I forgot, I also made wings, let me go get them."

When he retuned he not only had a large cooker full of wings but also Alaska and Hawaii in tow. Hawaii was carrying a large tray of tropical fruit for kebabs. Alaska on the other hand, seemed to be dragging a large dead animal behind him.

"Welcome to my home! Hawaii, ma'm you may place the fruit on the table here. Alasaka…are you planning to prepare that for grilling here?"

"Sure, If you don't want to. I can take care of it for you," replied Alaska cheerfully while pulling out a knife and dragging the animal away.

"My yard…" groaned Virginia.

"So glad you volunteered to have this at your house!" laughed NY while patting Virginia on the back.

"Yeah dude! It was a great idea to have it at your house! Thanks for inviting me! Here have some wine!" exclaimed California who seemingly popped up out of nowhere.

"Ah, thank you," replied a very shaken Virginia.

NY, however, was completely unfazed by the state's sudden appearance, "I'll take that."

"Hey Florida! Over here, dude!" California called to his newly arrived friend who was carrying a bag of oranges in one hand and a bag of 'entertainment' in the other hand.

"It really is not that kind of party, Florida," Deadpans the young territory of Puerto Rico, "here have some fritters."

"The internet is much better for porn anyway," commented Washington carrying a cup of coffee and wearing her laptop bag, "I brought the music, be grateful. Do you have wifi?"

"Hey Missourah why don't you let this idiot carry that?" Inquired Ozark while jerking his head over towards Arkansas.

"You idiot! Why would I carry your stupid beer? I have enough to carry on my own!" replied Arkansas, his arms all loaded down with Walmart bags.

"Hey Virginia! We brought the beer! You can't have a cookout without beer!" Chirped Missouri happily.

"Ah yes, I knew I could count on you two to bring enough beer to drown a micronation. I see you also brought Arkansas with you." Virginia replied.

"I brought myself thank you very much! I don't hang out with morons like those two! We just came from the same area! It is a coincidence!"

"Mizouree, please shut your friend up, this is a party," sighed Missouri while putting the beer into ice coolers.

"Ha! I love watching those three interact!" Laughed New York.

"Ah! Almost all of my children are here already!" shouted America excitedly as he walked over towards the two hosts of the party, ruffling Puerto Rico's hair on the way. "I brought buns, and ketchup for the burgers! So who is cooking? I'm starved!"

"I am," replied both NY and Virginia in unison.

"Both of you? Is there really that much to grill? This is going to be amazing!" Commented America, "I'm going to go find D.C.! Find me when the food is ready!"

Massachusetts arrived to find the two hosts of the party engaged in a very heated argument over who was going to cook. "Well the less I have to deal with New York the better," he muttered to himself as he walked over to the huge grill and began to fire it up.

Nevada arrived in time to see Virginia pull a knife on a very unaffected New York, "Hey guys! Why are you fighting? The food looks like it is almost done, maybe eating will help with whatever has your all worked up."

They both stop fighting and turn to look at her. "What do you mean the food is almost done?" questioned Virginia.

"Yeah, I haven't even started cooking yet," responded NY.

"Food is ready!" Shouted Massachusetts who then proceeded to make his own plate before getting trampled by his nation.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Memorial day has its roots post Civil War with the two states that get the most credit for it being NY and Virginia. It is very common in modern US for memorial day weekend to be full of cookouts, camping, family get together ect. There is a saying that nothing fazes a New Yorker. Virginia is very military. A large chuck of their economy comes from military sources and they have the largest number of navel bases in the US. This military influence is why he would always have a knife on him. Hunting is where a chunk of Alaska get a majority of their food. I figure he shot some farmer's cow on the way to the BBQ so it would be fresh instead of bringing something from home. Washington is the home of grunge music, something tells me not all the states will be grateful about her musical choice. Missouri has the most beer companies. Arkansas is the home of Walmart and there is always that person who shows up the a potluck with something they just picked up from walmart. Missouri believes a lot of stereotypes about Arkansas that Arkansas also believes about Missouri. The two states blame each other for everything. Northern California is known for wine. Florida is becoming the new porn capital of the US. America sees all the states and Territories as his children but none of them see him that way. All states are Chibi before they officially become a state then they start to age, hence why Puerto Rico is a child. New York and Virginia have been added to the Character Profiles. If there are any historical events you would like us to do please let us know. Please Review!


	8. Encounter Six: Baseball Rivals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Missouri and Illinois with a little Ozark

* * *

"Missorah! Your phone is buzzing over here again!" Ozark called over to his sister who was busy getting the grill all set up.

"Put your beer down and bring it here then! How lazy can you really be?" She calls back.

"Oh look it is your boyfriend calling. If I had noticed that, I wouldn't have bothered." Teased Ozark.

"Give me that!" snapped Missouri while snatching the phone from her brother, "He is no more my boyfriend than Arkansas is yours."

"Hello!" She answered brightly while turning her attention back to the grill.

"Are you ready to swim with the fishes?" Asked the menacing man on the other line.

"Swim? But that is against park regulations, Illinois!"

Illinois paused in confusion before asking, "Where are you?"

"Bennett Spring! Me and Ozark are having a cook-out."

"You are grilling without me? Everyone knows that I make the best hotdogs in the country."

"We didn't feel like having spaghetti. A real cook-out is meat and beer!" Chirped Missouri happily while seasoning the steaks she had added to the grill.

"On that note, I will see you on Friday. I will bring your cement shoes." Replied Illinois somewhat jokingly as he hung up.

"Cement shoes? He always says the strangest things during baseball season. Wisconsin and Minnesota need to stop getting him so riled up."

* * *

~April 23, 2012~

"Hello?" Answered Missouri while parking her car.

"I am almost there. Tell me again why we are meeting at a sports bar instead of Busch Stadium?" Inquired Illinois.

"Well, last time you got so drunk when your team lost that you pulled your gun and started threatening to off people. You kind of got banned from the stadium and you got me thrown out with you." She stated rather matter-of-factly.

"…Right…well I'm here so I'm hanging up."

"Ah such a sore loser," Missouri sighed to herself as she watched Illinois whip into the parking lot and park, "and a terrible driver."

* * *

~Inside the Bar after the Game~

"This cannot be how this ends! Come on Cards! We are better than this!" Yells a very angry and very drunk Missouri at the television.

"You thought you were all big and bad, having that pre-game show to celebrate your championship. This is what happens when you underestimate the Cubbies!" Laughs an also very drunk but happy Illinois. His statement was followed by lots of jeers and glares from the other patrons of the bar.

"Oh really? Don't let this little victory swell your head! You may have won the battle but we… we will win the war! I will see you at the World Series!"

The night resulted in the pair being banned from another establishment.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The St. Louis Cardinals (Missouri) and the Chicago Cubs (Illinois) have a long standing rivalry dating back before they were even called the Cubs or Cardinals but called White Stockings and Brown Stockings. In fact the Brown Stockings (Cardinals) were made only to beat the White Stockings (Cubs) because of a fierce trade rivalry the two states had at the time. Illinois has mafia tendencies because the area was well known for an active mafia and it exists as a standing stereotype today. It is another stereotype of the state that you cannot have a good cook-out without spaghetti. Chicago is well known for Pizza, Hot Dogs and Giyros among other things. Illinois drivers are considered not the greatest. Bennett Spring is a popular trout fishing State Park in Missouri (in the Ozark region). Missouri is home to several beer companies. Even the stadium is named after one. The Cubs haven't won a World Series since 1908 whereas the Cardinals has the Largest number of World Series wins out of the National League. On the April 12, 2012 game the Cardinals lost 9-5 despite their impressive pre-game celebration for winning the previous World Series. The Cardinals beat the Cubs 9/16 games in the 2012 season, so they did win the war. Neither of them, however, went to the World Series in 2012. Illinois has been added to the Character Profiles. If there are any historical events you would like us to do please let us know. Please Review!


	9. Encounter Seven: Huntin' Meese

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wisconsin, Ozark, Arkansas, and Alaska.

* * *

"So Alaska, why did you want to go hunting with us?" inquired Wisconsin.

"I was reading about white-tailed deer. They seem to be really popular to hunt in America but I don't have them at home. I thought this would be an interesting expedition." Replied the younger state.

"These deers are good huntin', right Ozark?" Laughed Arkansas while patting Ozark on the back.

"Don't touch me," laughed Ozark, "but it's real nice to be huntin' with you. Huntin' deers is a real man's sport."

"Yes, hunting deer is quite exciting," Smiled Wisconsin, "I'm glad you are here."

Alaska just smiled awkwardly, "Lets go, shall we?"

* * *

~Later~

"Look Alaska! Your first deer, right over there!" Pointed Wisconsin excitedly.

Alaska looked and saw what he considered a rather small animal, "I can't shoot that, it's just a baby."

"Baby? That there is at least an eight point buck!" Exclaimed Ozark.

"They don't come much larger than that," added Arkansas.

Alaska shrugged and put his gun on his back, "Well if it is for survival, I'm sorry little deer," He sighed as he threw his knife at it.

The other three watched in shock as the knife hit home and dropped the deer, a feat that they considered impossible. "Now THAT is a REAL man," Swooned Wisconsin.

"Well yes, I am a man…you just noticed?" Queried Alaska while heading over to retrieve his knife, "These aren't nearly as fun to kill as I thought they would be and there is so little meat."

"He may be a good hunter but he ain't too bright is he?" Whispered Arkansas to Ozark as they followed the other man over to his kill.

"These have a lot of meat, maybe not compared to what you hunt but still a lot of meat," responded Wisconsin.

"You should hunt with me back home; I promise you will have more fun than you do hunting these."

"A huntin' trip! That sounds amazing! We can handle anything you throw our way!" Exclaimed Arkansas, both him and Ozark feeling their masculine pride a bit injured.

"I would love to come see Alaska! Thank you for inviting us!" Responded Wisconsin excitedly.

Alaska threw the deer over his shoulder and turned to face the excited states behind him, he had only meant to invite her but the more the merrier, "Well, let me process this and we can schedule it. I will have to go and prepare my home for visitors before you can come."

* * *

~A week later~

"Wow, Alaska's home is so barren looking," commented Arkansas.

"Look over there! What is that walking down the street?" Pointed Wisconsin while opening a beer.

"Oh that is just a bear!" Explained Alaska finally arriving to greet the group, "They come and go as they wish"

"Oh look its headed our way!" Smiled Wisconsin while opening yet another beer.

"Make it go away!" squeaked Ozark in a manly way while Arkansas and him man-hugged for protection.

"Don't worry it won't hurt you, see it was just headed for the dumpster, shall we go?"

Both men separated and acted like nothing had happened. "There used to be bears in my area, they are on my flag," muttered Ozark.

"I see that your sister must have been the one to deal with the bears back then," poked Arkansas.

"Look who is talking, you were hanging off of me like a frightened child!"

"Okay boys, no need to get your panties in a bunch," interrupted Wisconsin, sensing a fight, "Let's go hunting and leave Mr. Bear to his breakfast."

"Are you sure you are ready to hunt?" inquired Alaska, gesturing to the pile of empty beer cans Wisconsin had made.

"I've never seen her hunt sober," commented Arkansas.

"I've never seen her sober," added Ozark.

Alaska just shrugged and lead them along to his hunting grounds.

"Are we huntin' meese?" asked Arkansas.

"We are hunting moose," corrected Wisconsin.

"Just one? Or one apiece?" inquired Ozark.

Alaska just ignored them and kept walking until finding the beast they were questing for. "Here we are."

The three of them stopped arguing looked to where Alaska was gesturing. "That is one big animal." Ozark observed.

"I don't think our deer rifles are going to do any damage to that thing!" Arkansas complained while holding out his gun for emphasis.

Wisconsin didn't say anything; she just pulled out her gun and took aim before her comrades could scare the animal off. In one shot she managed to kill the monstrosity. With pride she just lowered her gun and looked at the three men, "Its not the size that matters but how you use it."

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> White-tailed Deer are almost all over the North American Continent but they do not reach into Alaska. White-tailed deer stand about 3 to 3.5 feet tall at the shoulder (not small at all) but Moose stand between 5 to 6.5 feet at the shoulder (about twice the size). We added a little redneck dialect, hopefully we have not offended anyone. (the authors live in a redneck part of the country ourselves). Deers and Meese- Deer, elk and moose are all words that are the same both singular and plural but it is not uncommon for people to try to pluralize them anyway. The one that amuses us the most is meese. I guess people assume since moose is one letter off from goose that it is made plural the same- geese=meese. lol.
> 
> A common stereotype of Wisconsin is that they are always drunk but it is also a stereotype that it doesnt affect anything, they are still hard workers, educated, and safe drivers. Missouri used to have brown bears and their state seal (and by extension their flag) has two bears on it even though bears no longer call the state home. They do get the occasional bear passing through, though. There is a stereotype that bears always roam the streets in Alaska, which is untrue but it does happen occasionally. Arkansas and Southern Missouri (ozark) are very much alike but they always blame the other state for everything. Missouri calls Arkansas inbred, Arkansas calls Missouri inbred and so forth. In fact the Ozark mountains actually continue on from Missouri into Arkansas. We consider the two states very much alike and best friends but wont admit either to anyone, including themselves. OMG this is the first time Arkansas has been in a story without a Walmart joke!
> 
> So we failed to get this up last week so instead of two last week you get two this week. Minnesota will make his appearance! Wisconsin has been added to the Character Profiles. If there are any historical events you would like us to do please let us know. Please Review!


	10. Encounter Eight: Pizza

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Illinois, Wisconsin, Minnesota

* * *

Minnesota was watching television when a knock at the door marked the arrival of today's guests. Hopping over the couch to reach the door, he threw it open to reveal his friends. Wisconsin already had an open beer in hand and Illinois was lugging a large number of grocery bags with him.

"What is all that for? I thought we were just making pizza, not opening up a restaurant." Minnesota chuckled.

Illinois just glared in response while Wisconsin chimed in with, "You know that Illi cannot JUST make any OLD pizza. He HAS to use everything but the kitchen sink on HIS pizza."

"Fair enough," the host agreed, "Here, let me help you with those bags, Illi. You guys know where the kitchen is, come on in."

"Thanks." Illinois sarcastically replied while handing the heaviest bags over to the other state, "You guys know I hate that nickname, right?"

Minnesota accepted the bags like they weighed nothing and turned towards the kitchen, "Of course, why else would I call you that, Illi?"

Immediately upon entering the kitchen, Wisconsin plopped down at the table and opened another beer. The two men, however, began unpacking the shopping bags.

"Oh! I almost forgot! Since I knew you were coming, Illi, I picked something up for you at the mall," Minnesota said while opening a closet and pulling out something pink and frilly. He proudly unfurled it to reveal it was an apron with the phrase 'Kiss the Cook' on it.

"Burn in hell, I am NOT wearing that!" He glared fiercely at the taller state; debating how many bullets it would take to bring him down in a frontal assault.

"Ah but Illi, it would look great on you." Wisconsin poked, amusement written all over her face.

"It's not happening."

"Okay but it sure would be a shame if you got tomato sauce all over your nice suit." Minnesota teased while reopening the closet to put the apron away.

"NO!" Illinois shouted while snatching up the apron. "I mean it really cannot be helped- too much money went into this suit."

"You boys and your clothes, I thought I was the girl here. This outfit only cost me like maybe ten bucks, how much money did yours cost?"

Both men looked at each other and then back at her.

"I needed this suit for work, and there is nothing wrong with looking nice." Illinois defended.

"Illi is right, there is nothing wrong with taking pride in your appearance. I got this outfit at the mall; they were having a sale on shoes. I figured since I was there for shoes I might as well get some jeans and I am always needing new shirts."

"You and your mall," Wisconsin muttered, letting the subject drop.

Illinois removed his hat and scarf and donned the offending apron before beginning his famous pizza.

* * *

~~~A short time later~~~

Minnesota pushed his bangs back, noticing that the heat from the oven was making him sweat. "Sorry guys, I'm getting a little warm. I hope you do not mind." He explained as he removed both shirts to reveal his muscular body.

"You make me sick." The smaller man quipped while adjusting with the collar of his shirt.

"I don't mind at ALL!" Wisconsin answered while reaching down and starting to untie her own shirt.

Both males jumped out of their seats, "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

She looked at them both rather confused by their reactions, "But it IS getting hot. I am wearing a bra, its not like it matters."

"That does not make it better!" Shouted Minnesota.

"Keep your shirt on." Illinois snapped, giving her the strictest glare that he could manage at the time.

"But HE got to take HIS shirt off…HEY! We can ALL take our shirts off!" Wisconsin realized.

"NO!" the two men snapped in unison, making her slink down gloomily. Minnesota decided it was best to put one of his shirts back on to avoid any more outbursts.

"You guys are no fun sometimes," she pouted.

Illinois stood up to check the pizza, "We just don't share your enthusiasm for nudity." As he opened the oven door he heard a faint clicking sound.

"What the hell was that?" He asked eyeing the other two.

"What was what?"

"Illi I think you are going crazy from all that … 'work' that you do." Wisconsin responded innocently while fiddling with her phone.

"Maybe it was the oven or something. It sounded kind of like a camera but I know you both are too smart to take a picture of me like this. I know where you sleep." Illinois threatened.

Wisconsin just smiled before changing the subject, "Oh! I forgot to tell you about my adventure! Earlier this week I got to go hunting with Alaska, over at his place."

"Wait a moment, you went hunting in Alaska and you didn't invite me?" Minnesota replied, offended, "I mean- not inviting the theater boy here, I could understand- but you didn't invite ME?"

"HEY! I am a great hunter." Illinois growled in defense.

"Sure you are, good at hunting down spaghetti maybe." Minnesota retorted.

"Have you ever chased something down a pitch dark alley with only one bullet in your gun and still get your mar…target before?" Illinois defended angrily, almost making a mistake.

The other two just stared at the fuming state blankly before Minnesota spoke up, "Okay Illinois, buddy, I think you need some help with that rage problem."

"Like you are one to talk, Mr. Road Rage," the state in question spit back.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Minnesota's introduction! Red Rose of Doom has been waiting for him, I hope we didn't disappoint. These three are our friend trio! The group needs a name because right now we are calling them the Midwestern trio. We think the name is kind of misleading because there are 12 Midwestern states. Other friend groupings will appear in time. You have already seen one with both Missouris and Arkansas.
> 
> Minnesota is not super fashionable but he loves to shop because Minnesota is the home to Mall of America, which is the largest mall in the country and the 11th largest in the world. It even has a theme park in it. Illinois is always wearing nice clothes because when you combine the theater stereotype with the mafia stereotype you get Italian suits. He is a great cook, partly because of his heritage but also because Chicago is home to several nationwide famous foods. Sorry if Wisconsin got annoying when she emphasized certain words over and over. Illinois is the shortest of the three states by an inch. He is also very slight of build, think Italy brothers. The hunting adventure mentioned is encounter seven, if you haven't read it yet.
> 
> Next chapter is planned to be Nevada and Utah! Minnesota has been added to the Character Profiles. If there are any historical events you would like us to do please let us know. Please Review!


	11. Encounter Nine: Deseret Siblings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chibi Utah and Chibi Neveda/Utah and Nevada

* * *

Utah poured himself a cup of milk and grabbed the newspaper before pulling himself up into a chair. This was a daily habit for him, he would go out and buy the daily press and then go home to read it. He found it very relaxing and enjoyed staying informed on the status of both his territory and his country.

While reading about the growing struggle in the states, he heard Nevada enter the room. Looking up he was greeted by the sight of his sister in another of her…strange outfits heading towards the door. Sighing, he set his paper down and slipped from the chair to head her off.

"Where do you think you are going?" He asked as he held out his arms to block her exit.

"I am just going to visit some friends, why? Do you want to come with me? You really should get out of the house more, you know," she replied happily stopping in front of him.

"Is it necessary to be dressed like some kind of entertainer?"

"No," she pouted, "but I like this outfit. All the clothes you bring me are boring and stuffy."

"The clothes I bring you are what a proper young lady should be wearing, I will not let you leave dressed like a harlot."

Nevada brought her small hands to her hips, "I hardly look like a harlot, you are just a prude."

"I am not a prude, I just have standards," he replied, dropping his arms back to his side.

"I have standards!" His sister huffed, "They just don't include dressing like an old man!"

"I do not dress like an old man! Now go change your clothes!"

"You aren't my boss!"

"I run this territory, so I am indeed your boss. Now change!" He countered angrily.

"I don't even understand why you get to be in charge of our territory! We should share it!"

"We do share it, I just have more responsibility. I don't know why you are bringing this up again."

"Oh really we share it?" She spit, "Then tell me why everyone only listens to you and why our territory is named after you?"

"Maybe because I am the more reliable one. No one can take you seriously dressed like that. You should imitate me more."

"Whatever! We are just too different! I get it, you are religious! Fine! It works for you but not for me! You can keep your prudish ways! I am going to go become a state without you!" She shouted while waving her arms around for emphasis.

"You don't mean that, you always leave and then end up coming back," He stated quietly, a little hurt by her outburst.

"I mean it, and I will be a state before the next presidential election! Just you wait! Then we will see who the irresponsible one is!"

Stepping out of her way, he grumbled, "Good luck becoming a state by then, I look forward to it."

Neither of them moved for a moment before she marched out the door and slammed it as hard as her little arms could.

Utah just stared at the door for a few minutes before shaking his head in defeat and returning to his chair. He was fairly certain that she would be back after calming down, she was always overacting to things like this. He was also pretty sure that if one of them were to become a state without the other, it would be him-as soon as him and America could see eye to eye about the whole marriage issue.

* * *

~~~Three years later~~~

Utah sat reading about the impending election, when he heard someone knock. Sighing, he hoped down from his chair to answer the door. He had been getting a lot of visitors recently and it was really starting to wear him thin. Hopefully him and America could resolve their dispute soon and he could go back to living in peace.

Opening the door he was surprised to find his sister and was even further surprised to see that she appeared to have grown taller than him, "Oh Nevada! What brings you here? Did you decide to move back in?"

"No silly!" She laughed as she skipped into his living room, "Guess what!"

"I have no idea Nevada," he sighed as he shut his door.

"Oh come on! I know you always read the paper! You must have heard!" She chirped happily while stealing his chair. She had defiantly gotten taller.

Crossing his arms he looked her over before smirking, "It is difficult to be informed when someone interrupts my reading, so why don't you just tell me yourself?"

"Tsch, that is no fun! You have always been such a stick in the mud," she pouted.

"Okay, tell me or don't tell me. Would you like something to eat?"

She smiled before springing up from the chair. "Yes! I believe we should eat something to celebrate! I am now a bona fide state! That is right ladies and gents, you are looking at the 36th state!" She exclaimed while twirling and striking a pose.

Utah took the opportunity to claim his chair back, "You realize that you and I are the only ones here right?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Never mind, I should be used to your theatrics by now. Don't you think you cut it a little close to the election?"

"Yeah! I had to send all my paperwork by telegraph, it was really expensive and sooo much work!" She complained before brightening, "It was worth it though! Not only do I get to participate in the election but I also got to set a record! Apparently I sent the longest telegraph ever!"

* * *

~~~Modern day~~~

Nevada was nudged awake from her dreams of times long past. Straightening up she realized that she was sitting at her desk at her home office; she must have fallen asleep while working- again.

"If you know you are going to work the next day, you shouldn't stay out late," Utah lectured, alerting her to his presence, "Also, you should lock your door."

"Some of us like to have a little fun now and then," she replied, spotting a fresh cup of coffee on the desk next to her, "I had forgotten that you were coming today, I'm sorry."

"That doesn't surprise me," he smiled.

"Thank you for the coffee. I was dreaming about when I became a state."

"No problem, I figured you might want some when you woke up," he replied while pulling himself a chair and straddling it, " now tell me about your dream."

She sipped her coffee while recounting her dream to him, " You know, you didn't seem that surprised when I told you. I never thought about it before now, but you acted like you already knew."

"Well, I was reading the newspaper when you arrived," He shrugged.

"And did your magic paper tell you what I was doing over the three years that I was gone? You didn't seem too worried about me."

"I knew you could take care of yourself besides, I was busy fighting with America at the time."

She just smiled and finished her coffee. He could say whatever he wanted but she knew that he had kept tabs on her the whole time she was gone. Hell, she was sure he still did it, though he would never admit it.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> So I realize this is just a 50 state version of the first episode of Hetalia but it was written that way because we felt it was the best way to start this. This is supposed to be our version of Hetalia within the USA. Actual Hetalia characters will appear from time to time but that is not the focus of the story. If there are any historical events you would like us to do please let us know. Most chapters will be short skits but probably longer than this one. Also the focus will be mostly modern day America but we will also be showing historical events.


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